lindsay garner

lindsay garner

photographer.

college student.

sports lover.

adventurer.

artist.

I love stories.

I love sharing them and listening to them.

I’m most passionate about bringing hope to others

through sharing my past and the way that Jesus has changed my life.

Whether I’m doing that through my photography,

leading a small group of middle school girls at church,

or a coffee (actually, hot chocolate for me) date at Starbucks,

I want people to see the new life I have found 

& find hope that Jesus can do the same in their lives.

In 8th grade my life started on a downward spiral

that lasted until my freshmen year of college...

I was desperate to find love, value, and acceptance

but was looking in all the wrong places.

 boys. hook ups. parties.

What I thought would fill me up left me even emptier than before.

Each time I went searching and got let down,

I fell further into a spiral I couldn’t seem to break free from.

I was consumed with shame and guilt
every second of every day for the choices I was making.

Meanwhile, despite all the bad decisions and guilt,

I was excelling at one of the things I loved most: field hockey.

Every time I stepped on the field I felt at home and my problems disappeared.

I adored the game and couldn’t get enough if it.

I started playing in 8th grade all the way through 12th grade.

In 10th grade I started playing year around in hopes of reaching my biggest goal –

earning a field hockey scholarship to a Division One college.

It was clear by the summer between my junior and senior year

that my dream was going to become a reality.

I was receiving offers from schools wanting me to play for them,

and after some visits to those schools, I decided on Temple University.

I verbally committed to playing for Temple in July 2009 before my senior year.

In January 2010 during my senior year,
I officially signed the National Letter of Intent,
which is a legal document stating that I accept the scholarship offered
 & commit to playing for Temple University.

Fast-forward to the summer before going off to college..

It was the middle of July and I had to be at field hockey preseason on August 11th.

Still making destructive decisions, one of those ended up causing me to decide

it wasn’t best to go to Temple and play field hockey.

About 2.5 weeks before my dream was about to come true,

it crumbled before my eyes...

Everything I had ever wanted and worked for was gone.

It was one of the worst days, if not the worst day of my whole life.

Despite all the emotions I was feeling, I had to think quickly.

It was almost August and I needed a new college to go to...

I applied to PA College of Art and Design (PCAD) to major in Photography.

Throughout high school I was always taking pictures.

I took all the art classes my school had to offer, so art school sounded exciting to me. 

A few days after I applied I found out that they only accept 50% of applicants.

I lost all hope of getting in.

Only 25 days before classes were scheduled to start at PCAD,

I received a letter in the mail.

I was accepted.

My freshmen year of college looked a lot like my high school years.

But finally during my sophomore year of college,

God started to get a hold of my life.

I started going to church and I met people there who began investing in my life.

They taught me about Jesus; His love. His forgiveness. His grace.

Since my sophomore year of college, Jesus has radically transformed my life.

I am a totally different person than I was in high school.

All of the guilt that used to consume my life has been replaced with:

the understanding that I am a new creation in Christ.

He has forgiven me & calls me His beloved daughter.

God has taught me that following Him and living life the way He says

is so much better than one night of feeling good.

He has taught me that the freedom and satisfaction

I had been looking for all those years

only comes when I am obedient to Him.

The boys. the hooking up. the partying.

 all the bad decisions…

they are SO pale in comparison to following Jesus.

Although I wouldn’t ever want to repeat the things from my past,

I’m thankful they are a part of my story

because they have made me into the person I am today.

I constantly used to ask the question,

“how could all of the sin from my past ever be used for good?”

Jesus is currently in the process of answering that,

in bigger and more glorious ways than I could have ever imagined.

As the Lord has been redeeming my past,

one thing He has put on my heart is the desire to use my past to impact others.

I want to verbally share my story, but I don’t just want to only talk about it.

I also want to come up with creative ways to share.

One big way I do that is sharing through my photography and my art. 

I want to make pictures that reflect the grace and love of God

that’s transformed my heart.

A lot of times this includes making photos that use metaphors

& biblical references for inspiration.

I want to reach all people with my story.

My heart is inclined to share with women;

more specifically middle school/high school aged girls.

Girls who are the same age I was when I began making destructive decisions.

I want to communicate they don’t have to search any further than Jesus 

for the love, acceptance, & the value they so deeply long for.

I want to be a living example that Jesus saves, restores, and transforms;

that there is no place where we can go that will separate us from His love.

connect with Lindsay on

twitter: @LLGarner

her tumblr page

amanda hann

amanda hann

wife to the tall guy.

            soon-to-be-momma.​  

investor of the future generation.

crazy in love with my Lolapup.

  ​Everyone of us spends some, if not all, of our childhood years

dreaming about what we want to be when we grow up.

We share. We dream (hopefully big).

And all too often we let other people crush them, doubt us,

and create ways to make us wonder if we really can do “it.”

Then, we reach this time in our lives when we’re unstoppable.

We believe in who we are and who we want to become.

To this day, from those early days when I was a child dreaming of

what I wanted to be when I grew up, I knew what it would be.

Today, I found my “it.”
I am a teacher.

I believe I will be a teacher for life,
whether it’s behind the brick and mortar or not...

my mission in life is to teach.

To teach what?

That’s the part that makes me alive. Not knowing the plan He has for me,

I try to allow God to show me who sits in my audience.

I want to teach whomever my path crosses.

What I love most about teaching is the fact that while I teach,

I learn. I grow.

Just as much as the learner himself.

That’s the power in my purpose.  

​No one ever finds their "it" without someone or something influencing them.

When I think about influence,

I can’t help thinking of the people who have played such a role in my journey.

The circumstances, both positive and negative,

that have shaped me into the person I am full of the passion I’ve made my own.

Consider Mrs. Simpson...

She was my first grade teacher.

She's a huge influence in who I am as a person and the educator I've become.

Cliché, I know, everyone says their first grade teacher made a difference.

For me it's truth.

It was first grade visitation day...

My mom had recently been admitted to the hospital for a gall bladder surgery.

Knowing there was no chance of my mom taking me, my Grandpa stepped up & took me.

Nervous because first grade was monumental.

Even more nervous, and slightly embarrassed,

because my Grandpa was taking me when it should have been with my mom.

Everyone else had a parent with them except me.

But Mrs. Simpson celebrated my Grandpa being present with me

all the while assuring me it was extra special.

At that moment, I knew first grade would be okay.

She taught me valuable lessons.

She taught me how to make any child learn: love them first.

Every day I remind myself that any child can learn.

However, before learning happens, love does.

Influence is powerful.

My prayer each day is that I allow others to influence me in positive ways

And use the negative experiences as a catalyst for change.

Lucky for me, there have been people in my life who have modeled this for me and 

challenged me to bring my best

To influence others and circumstances in positive ways.

Whether in my personal life or professional life,

​I believe whole-heartedly God created me to love children.

Creating desires in my heart to have my very own children,

I have used the last ten years of my life to make a difference in the lives of other children.

No matter what my professional path looks like, at the core, will always be children first.

Whether working one-on-one in the classroom teaching kids to read,

or now working with their teachers to help them become more effective with their instruction;

my core focus is the health of the whole child.

​Year after year, I wondered what God’s plan for me would be.

He’d given me so much...

A steady job that allowed me to go to work each day. Loving what I did.

Influencing and impacting in ways I would have never dreamt imaginable.

He allowed me to cross paths with an amazing young man, Adam,

who has taught me so much about the person I want to be.

I had it all.
a job. a husband. a pup. a house. a car to drive.

Yet, I felt like life was missing something..

All I ever wanted to be was a mom.

And for some reason, God wasn’t letting that happen.
For years, my husband had cautiously waited for the right time.
When “our” right time was here, nothing happened. Months came and months went.
Frustrated by disappointment, I became bitter.
Like many women’s stories, I realized I wasn’t alone.
However, that didn’t make it feel any better.
I’d get annoyed when I wanted to celebrate the joys of others.
While in my heart I was happy for them, if I were really honest,
every time I heard someone’s news, a part of me would ache.
Selfishly ache. 

No matter how much I’d pray that desire to go away. It wouldn’t.
A cycle of praying it away, followed by hearing other’s news resulting in angry, bitter feelings.
I remember vividly the day I came home from work saying,
“Adam, If one more person tells me they’re having a baby…”
It was at that moment I realized I needed an attitude and a heart check.
It was then I decided not to pray away the desire, but to pray for patience.
Needless to say, the patiently waiting part was the hardest.
However, I needed to trust God’s timing and not worry about my own.

Today, excitedly I can share within less than five months,
not only will God fill the desire of my heart, He’ll put in my hands
the little boy He’s blessed us with.

Knowing I always wanted to be a mother, I believe His plan for me.
Though frustrated and annoyed along the way.
It prepared me to be the mother I am about to become.
Freaked out & feeling totally incompetent to the do the job that lies before me,
I have never been more excited to begin a journey.

This adventure is about to rock our world.
With ten years of experience caring for other people’s children
it's taught me so much about who He created me to be at my core...
a mother.

​As any mother would hope, it is her children she'll have the greatest impact on.
I hope the same for my little man as he enters the world.
My heart has been created for loving the little people we call our children.
Often times we forget that the little people we raise
will one day become the big people who will run the world.
I think we forget that the people that matter the most are the ones with
the innocent hearts and the big eyes looking up at us as role models.
Whether we realize it or not,
they’re constantly watching our every move,
hanging on every word,
striving to be just like the “big” people in their lives.

To me, that responsibility is greater than any other I could ever have.
This is what I was made for.

connect with Amanda here:
twitter: @countingon

shea mack

shea mack

wife to @josephadammack

dog mama to blue.

nanny of four kiddos.

avid adventurer.

lover of things handmade. 

I find joy in giving things a purpose.

I believe my purpose is to serve others.

Here is my story:

Born, raised, and currently in Pennsylvania.
I grew up with divorced parents, since I was just a year old.
Divorced was all I ever knew.
Two separate families, houses, neighborhood friends, two separate everything.
Since it had been for almost my entire life, it wasn't new to me.
Not saying it was easy, it was just all the familiar.

My mom remarried when I was five.
My dad on the other hand, dated occasionally, but didn't remarry til I was fifteen.
My dad and I were inseparable growing up, attached at the hip if you will.
There is just something sacred about a daddy-daughter relationship.
When he met my step mom it felt like my importance level dropped drastically.
It was incredibly hard for me to accept & adjust to.
In those moments, I felt completely alone.

Right around this time I started going through some changes.

I struggled with many issues:

depression, my body image, promiscuity, acceptance.. to name a few

I was very vulnerable to choices that led to hurt.
Yet for some reason I continued to make them..time after time.

On the outside I looked happy,

But inside I was emotionally struggling.

At my lowest low, I attempted to take my life.
I didn't succeed, but I received attention..which was what secretly I longed for.

I couldn't escape my earthly troubles & thought I didn't matter.
 

I desired a worth greater than I felt I had.
I came to the conclusion I would find that in the guys I was with.
How I was so wrong. I got nothing meaningful out of these relationships.
They only left me feeling hurt & worthless on way too many levels.
In those moments we are carefree,
yet the thought of how they will affect us in the future is never prevalent.
What a shame that is.

God had a plan for my life, I just was completely lost & easily misguided.
I had been searching for a belonging & a unconditional love that I was unsure even existed.

It wasn't til I met my husband Adam, aka: the man of my dreams,
(in my early twenties) that I had a revelation.

 

He stepped in & challenged me to change my destructive ways.
I was naturally reluctant at first, but then

I started to dream of a future I wanted to have. I had hope.
It didn't look anything like what I was doing at that point.
It actually was drastically different.
He encouraged me to live a life fully for God.
To be honest with you, I was clueless to what this meant.
 

I began searching...
Sure enough, God showed up in big ways.
And for the first time in a long time
I felt somehow new & engaged in life.
He changed my heart!

I began to view myself in a different light.
He has called me to truly serve others and to lead in areas I never would've imagined.
On the daily I'm learning more and more what that looks like.
By serving others, my heart mends & it beats with true joy.
I have made a variety of choices on the spectrum of bad to good,
but with each one I'm grateful as they have shaped me and my story.


 

I serve in my church leading a group of high school aged girls.

It brings light to my life as I have the chance to be a good influence.
Something I wish I had more of as a teenager, in some of the most challenging years.
We have the chance to bring forth life in every opportunity we've been given.
That to me is a crucial & amazing gift that we don't take advantage enough.

As a girl, we long for acceptance and to feel loved.

We desire a worth that only God can provide. It's the truth.
For me, I struggled until I finally realized that God made me..ME.
This was MY story He gave me. I needed to own that.
Different, unique, but ever so perfect to Him.
What reigned true is: I matter to God, and that is such a beautiful thing.

This past summer, I had the opportunity to serve as a leader in the Czech Republic
with a team of amazing high school aged student from church.

 

It was completely life giving in countless ways.

God showed me just how valuable I am to Him.
How important it was to take that leap of faith to lead like this..
completely on a new and crazy page.
How HE created ME for a purpose.
This adventure sparked some challenging situations,
but it brought me closer to understating truly how I'm wired.
 

I am certain God sent me there to learn that I am worthy.
I am worthy of...
unconditional love // grace // value // second chances // everlasting joy

God created my heart to serve others.
& I'm eternally thankful He is my creator.
 

 

 

connect with shea on

twitter & instagram:

@littlemrsmack

<3

www.mackmade.blogspot.com

susan ferrari

susan ferrari

wife of music man.

stay-at-home mom of three boys.

author of #dearbaby.

photo blogger #artofmotherhood.
 

 

I have heard women talk about how they have dreamt of being a wife/mom for as long as they can remember; this was not the case for me. My parents divorced when I was three, so marriage, and by association, motherhood scared the hell out of me. And honestly, I never thought much about it. I could never seem to picture any of those things... for me. 

 

For the first 17 years of my life, I struggled with feeling like
there was something fundamentally wrong with me. 

 

Then came 18. I was lost, lonely, and hopeless when I met Jesus. In that moment, I was overwhelmed by peace, one that surpassed all of my understanding. For the first time my stars were aligned; and I knew the person I was was exactly the me I was meant to be. My heart felt home, all corners of it, even the darkest ones. And this gave me hope. 

 

That same year I met my husband. I pretty much loved him instantly. And three years later I became his wife. I had never been so terrified and so sure of anything in all my life. 

But, God's story takes us to places we wouldn't choose to go on our own,
but is somehow exactly where we need to be.

 

Five years later, I was pregnant and we were having a baby. We, the couple who were constantly on the "5 year" plan. At 11 weeks, I miscarried. I once heard miscarriage described as, "the bleeding out of dead dreams". And, it was. My dead dream. A dream I didn't even know I had, or wanted. My dream died, yet in this dark place, a longing was birthed. I knew then that something, someone, was missing from my life. 
 

Three months later, I was pregnant! And nine months after that, a piece of my heart was living outside of my body. Cole. Lying on my chest, wrapped up in my new mommy arms, I couldn't even begin to understand it then, but my life - and all of me - was forever changed.

 

 

Two years later we had our second baby boy, Cohen. My boys were rocking my world (in the best way) but tending to the needs of little ones is exhausting and I struggled with feeling like I was losing whole parts of myself. So finding out I was unexpectedly pregnant with our third boy, felt like it was either going to make or break me.


 

One day, as I was processing through my ever-changing emotions regarding this unexpected third pregnancy, it hit me. This would be my last time experiencing pregnancy. This would be the last time that I would ever have this time just baby and me, so intimately. I started thinking about how fast time goes by and it made me realize the value of being intentional with the moments of this final pregnancy. It made me want to embrace this gift rather than miss out on it. I began writing mama notes to my #dearbaby documenting my thoughts on social media, and for some reason people latched on to it and it encouraged and inspired my heart to keep sharing. #dearbaby became one of the most beautiful, vulnerable, shared moments of my life.

 

Over the months that followed Cam's birth, I could tell I was rooting deeper into motherhood. I was letting go of who I thought I should be and was becoming more of who I was designed to be. Things were no doubt hard, and with three boys under the age of 5, I was more spent than ever. Yet, through #dearbaby God had been conditioning my heart and my perspective to look for the beauty in the struggle. 

It occurred to me, one day, that maybe, the greatest artistic expression I can have on this world is through the upbringing of my boys. Maybe, my art is in them. The Art of Motherhood. By embracing my role as mother, some of the most authentic parts of me were blooming. I wasn't losing me, I was becoming a more complete me.

My boys were translating a part of my heart that had been foreign to me
until they came along. 

 

Parenting is one of the most difficult and vulnerable things I have ever done in my life. Our days are messy. And wild. And beautiful. And ugly. In fact, I'm fairly confident that if this were my actual "job", I would be fired on the daily. I certainly still scream at my kids, care more about me than them, overact, am too tired, overlook their needs, and fight for my own recognition which usually results in the robbing of my ambition. But it's in these moments that I find beautiful reflections of God in me. In my boys (And there is my next post). Much of what is birthed out of my parenting, in my photos and in my art, comes from the dark places. Out of the struggle, I gain insight into the depths of God’s beauty, and these insights inspire me. My hope is that they will inspire others, too. 

 

This is my art of motherhood. 

 

follow susan on twitter/instagram at @susaneferrari

read more about #dearbaby at: Http://dearbabypost.blogspot.com

or art of motherhood at: http://www.artofmotherhood.tumblr.com